Secret Pleasures

This list could go on forever, but I just wanted to mention a few things that I delight in secretly whether it be because it is out of my character to do so, or just obviously embarrassing.

-sequins

-doing math; maybe after reading and analyzing and never coming to any pertinent or redeeming conclusion it's just nice to have one thing for certain

-lame teeny-bopper-overcome-all-challenges movies such as Step Up, Step Up 2: the Streets (which has much more kick if you say it quickly like this- step up to the streets), Center Stage, Take the Lead, Raise Your Voice, and the like

-dum dums (as in the lollipop)

-the shape of my ankles if I'm lying on my bed with my legs above my head and toes pointed

Well, now that that's out in the open I feel much better. What are your secret pleasures?

TAG TAG TAG

Not that I typically use lower case for the pronoun "I", but Lester tagged me in her blog and I copy and pasted the format. And, Les has cleverly opted for no upper cases at all in her blog, so instead of seeming illiterate it comes off as thematic, and lovable. So smart, Les, so smart. Therefore, I am too lazy to change all the "i"s to "I" even though I took the time to write that disclaimer.

i am - a strict Chinese teacher and supportive sister

i think - all people should have a terrible part-time job at one point in life

i know - how to compliment others

i want - to speak Japanese for Kazue

i have - five beautiful nieces and nephews

i wish - I already had my MBA degree

i hate - feeling inadequate

i miss - my Taiwanese kindred spirits

i fear - being alone

i feel - blessed with loving family and friends

i hear - my dad saying "this too shall come to pass."

i smell - the unfriendly soap from the science center


i search - for friendship in a "kindred spirit" kind of way

i wonder - about architecture

i regret - not taking chances on love


i love - seeing the stars, again; delighting other people with kindness and humor

i care - about what others' think of me

i always - side with the underdog and nice guy

i am not - thin (that was really the first thing that came to mind, ha ha)

i believe - in God

i dance - when the music is right, and it's usually right

i sing - when doing the dishes, without fail


i don't always - tell the truth

i write - to remind myself how powerful words are

i win - when I eat a balanced diet

i lose - when I take myself too seriously


i listen - to my shuffle: an eclectic mix streaming from Smashing Pumpkins to A. Bocelli

i'm scared - of the dark (which is why I still do the run and leap after turning off the light and getting into bed)

i read - multicultural novels and memoirs.

i'm happy about - procrastinating my Shakespeare homework to write this; bring it on Bard!

So, now I get to tag someone. Of course, Hider and Devry because they need encouragement to blog.

CHINGLISH

Yesterday, was driving to and fro running errands and getting registered to be a substitute so that I can help out with the Chinese classes at the local Junior High. I'm a little nervous about the first day of school and have many urges to lay my clothes out the night before, or call up everyone I know to see if we have any of the same classes, except for the boy I have a crush on because then he might know I like him. But that's not my point...



...The point being, I was listening to a little NPR (which is what I do when I want to feel smarter than I am) and was briefing myself on the relations and current military uprisings (my fancy and ambiguous way of saying war because I'm not sure if it really should be categorized as war) between Russia and Georgia. Anyway, they played a sound bite (or is it byte?) of President Bush speaking of his friendly relationship between he and Putin; W. calls him Vladimir. But that's all changed, now.



However, the next sound clip (different word use there) completely distracted me from the whole topic of the radio program. Bush says, "I trust people on their word until otherwise." Well, that's obvious- you trust someone until you don't. Maybe there should be another clarifying verb in there. I recommend "proved", nothing too fancy or too original.



I didn't vote for him, but I still kind of love him. You know. He's such a great sport with all of us making fun of him. I'll be honest, I'm a little sad that he's moving out of the White House for the sole reason of humor.



It reminds me of the Tianozoic time period: so much funny English popping around. I couldn't resist sharing some of the great English rhetoric spewing from the little island Formosa. Most of it comes from all my Taiwanese companions; the others are just miscellaneous moments of Chinglish goodness. (The best part is how I have made a smooth transition and sturdy connection between George W. and Chinglish.)



From the mouth of Shi (pronounced "sure"); she learned most of her English from a radio, and then from me (zao gao/messy cake):



"I'm totally 100% afraid of snake."


"You got to know what's in your deep."


"Sister Tips, you will lose your pounds."


"Will you be my boyfriend?"


"Because I have circle-face!"


"Any boy who writes that many pages is boyfriend."



From the mouth of the Xiao-meister:



"I love you with my true heart."

"Sister Tian, I no feel your love."



From the mouth of Mickey Chen:



"You are wisdom and beautiful."

"I am Captain Am-azing." (I have no idea where she got that from.)


Printed on the face of the weight scale I bought in Nanzi: Presenting you with nice slim body

"Kiss and Ride"- printed on a road sign (this is HH's kind of country)

Printed outside the bathroom of a small restaurant in Renwu, right above the "corresponding" Chinese characters: CRAPPER

"Are you going new places? I will show you neat things." (printed on a book-magnet)

"AUSPICIOUS" (printed on a scooter helmet with a big-four leaf clover- who needs lucky?)

BEIJING 2008

(Cameron Spencer/Getty; Times Online)

So, needless to say, I've been consuming as much of the Olympics as I possibly can. I'm an avid supporter of the Olympics. When I was a little girl, women's gymnastics and and The Little Mermaid were basically on the same level of greatness to me. Actually, they both still are on a pretty high level in the "levels of greatness" in my mind. Other things that win medals in the "levels of greatness" include various foods (particularly tropical fruit, dairy, and pastries), expensive new lip gloss, homework due dates postponed- but only before you've done the homework, people who tell me I'm beautiful (I'll take "hot" too), and clean bathrooms. But, ever since the Olympics have been at Beijing, they have surpassed all levels of greatness, even Ariel and her seashell cups.

In the B.T. world (Before Tian), I really found the Chinese culture quite mysterious, and my greatest link to them yet another Disney animation: Mulan. (By no means do I mean to discredit Mulan and all it's greatness.) However, in the Tian and Post Tian worlds, so much more has been revealed. (I will spare you my mission memoir right now.) SO... let's take a "little" quiz.

The following two characters are the Chinese equivalent of the English "GO!" Not as in "stop and go" but as in you are cheering for David Beckham to either head the ball into the goal or break up with Victoria so that you two can finally get to know each other.

The first character is pronounced Jee-yah (Jia1) and the second is pronounced Yo (you2). On the first character kind of sing a straight note in your upper register. No slurs please; these aren't IDOL auditions. On the second character, start a little lower in your register and move your voice up, or follow this line with your voice: / GOOD! (I hope you are reading this at work because it's a great conversation starter.)

加 油

Now, for the quiz. You have two options. One means China and one means America. The goal is to complete the phrase: GO [answer here]!!!! So, what's your choice. Don't look it up; take a guess first.

1) 中國

2) 美 國

Okay, the next post will have the answer. Oh, this is great fun!

Pam-oglyphs

I'm liking this new background; it doesn't make me feel nearly uneasy as the dots. Bloggy likes it too.

So, Podly and Chenko convinced me to go to Denver this weekend to check in on Barrister Joe and the fam. What good fun came of it despite the 100 degree weather. (Post Tian life is great when it comes to the summer: since Taiwan, I have no sensitivity to heat. The other day I met this cute lady at the MTC- we were pretending to be investigators- sisters, to be exact, even though we are forty years apart. Anyway, we got talking about Taiwan and she mentioned, "Well, Ping Dong has two suns, you know." [It sounded really poetic in Mandarin.] Now, I have gone overboard because not only have I written more inside the parentheses than outside, but I am putting brackets within brackets. AHHHH!!!!!}}]]]]))

Back to the trip to Denver. We drove. It was long and gas station treats are lose their excitement after three hours.

Fortunately, this wasn't one of those typical Tian-Family trips with the old Isuzu Trooper. Due to the number of children in the clan, I often sat in the back with all the bags, facing opposite the direction of driving, thus, providing easy humor for the car behind us. To this day, I have this weird syndrome about giving up shot-gun to those who are older than me. I used to think it was part of the constitution of the United States.

Nice Person: Tian, you can have shot-gun.

Tian: Oh, no, you are older.

Nice Person: What does that have to do with anything?

Tian: It's the law.

Nice Person: (quizzical expression) What law?

Tian: I'm not sure, but I would feel better sitting in the back with the luggage, please.

There are other things I associate with driving too, besides the constitution. One of those is the San Rafel Swell. If you don't know what that is, then you were a blessed, blessed child and you probably took normal vacations like going to Disney Land. The Swell is the scenic route home from any Southern Beehive State location to our home.

I don't mean to belittle anthropology, archaeology, early civilizations, or historical monuments of any sort; but, in my book, once you've seen one petroglyph you've seen them all. And they don't evolve, by any means. Petroglyphs don't change over time; I know, because I'm smart like that.

So, whenever Pamlamadingdong gets that must-see-PETROGLPHYS-look in her eye, I like to remind her that Petroglphys are a lot like a Norton Anthology of early British Literature: they don't update through time. It's not like you can get a better edition.

Let's wear costumes!!!

Yes, I know--I am vain about my blog. But I was thinking this morning, "I get dressed every day in (hopefully) something different, why not Bloggy? Bloggy wants to look good. And, too be completely honest, I wasn't very peaceful about the dots.

So, Bloggy will be dawning new clothes and accessories periodically. Don't let it scare you away; it's still Bloggy.

Speaking of wearing clothes, one of my dear friends is staying in town rather than moving to one of the original thirteen colonies and that makes me really joyous. (That didn't have anything to do with wearing clothes but I wanted a good transition.) I just wanted to make one brief remark about how happy I am that Craigery isn't moving to D.C.

Of course, I don't want to gloat in his misery of having to stay in the second most arid state of the union, but perhaps subtle phrases like bare feet and wading, costume parties, Turandot, hummus, whirling dervish, and existential quantifier will make him feel better. I know that I always run a couple of those through my head when I'm having a long day, or a brief spout of depression, and it makes me feel much much better.

Besides being an oh so charming older brother-but-not-your-brother, Craigery has many good qualities. Since lists are this year's new black, here's a Column of Craigery Qualities:

-Latin crab dancing (this is a highly technical and advanced form of Latin Ballroom and has yet to be featured on So You Think You Can Dance)

-Showing up extremely late but yet giving the impression that he's right on time and he couldn't wait to get there

-Laughing ridiculously into the phone for minutes at a time at absolutely nothing

-Noticing and complimenting great rhetoric, alliterations, and new shirts

-Becoming obsessed with inanimate objects but not feeling a bit bashful or insecure about telling people about it

-Making small talk without giving the impression that he's making small talk

-Supporting any sort of need to release the inner-child

-Good kisser (okay, I'm totally kidding about that, but I just wanted to make him gasp and HH has been begging for more DRAMA)

-Ability to make and maintain friendships with ANYONE

-Willing and gleeful to join in any spontaneous song and dance

-Okay with allowing me to describe him as "gleeful"

-Being honest enough to tell me that if I want him to read Bloggy then I have to talk about him. (Let's face it, we all like to hear our own name, but only Craigery will admit it.)

"You selfish, selfish girl."

I read an article in the newspaper that made some implications to the ultimate selfishness of blogs. Well, duh! Isn't that why we blog?

I personally blog because...(well, main reason is ProSc makes us but he never checks to see if we really are blogging; so, this is more like reasons I continue to blog)

1) I am QUEEN of my blog.
2) I can talk about pretty much whatever pleases me at the time.
3) I can be as e-lam as I want.
4) I get to nickname people various different names and they are just grateful I'm not exposing their real identity to the virtual public (even though Fuzzy Robot has a way of finding out who anyone is in the digital network. Be careful of F. Robot- she may seem harmless, but she's a stalking genius.)

Of course there are other reasons to blog but they are selfish too. Hum. So, in an attempt to add to the completer selfishness of my bloggery, here's something entirely about ME!!!

For being the youngest of five, I am naturally the most talented and beautiful. In a frightful frenzy of revenge my older siblings have tried to alter my perceived sense of self in unusual ways. Their favorite method: nicknames.

All of my nicknames and their derivatives:

Woggy
Woggins
Holly Berry
Berry
Sister Tips
Tian Jiemei
Sister Tian
Boticelli
Chelly
Chell
Hollencia
Hollence of Arabia
Bits of Dew
"B"
Hollini
Holly Rose Bud
Hooly
Tippy
Hai Ruo
Holls
Holly Woddle Doodle Oddle Day
Miracle-cle
Suber Baby
Belly
Hooligan
Waldorf (Yes, as in -Historia)

Now you understand why I am so strange.

Wikipedia has some interesting things to say about nicknames (notice that nicknames are either cruel or endearing and sometimes both; funny how those two feelings get mixed up):

"A nickname is a name of an entity or thing that is not its proper name. It may either be used instead of, or in addition to, the proper name. Not to be confused with a familiar or truncated form of the proper name, such as Bob, Bobby, Rob, Robbie, Robin, and Bert for Robert which is called a short name.
The term hypocoristic or "pet name" is used to refer to a nickname of affection between those in love or with a close emotional bond, compared with a term of endearment. The term diminutive name refers to nicknames that convey smallness of the names,[clarify] e.g., referring to children. The distinction between the two is often blurred.
As a concept, it is distinct from both pseudonym and stage name, and also from a title (for example, City of Fountains), although there may be overlap in these concepts.
A nickname is sometimes considered desirable, symbolising a form of acceptance, but can often be a form of ridicule."